I have a solid group of friends, a supportive family and a clear awareness of who I am and who I want to be. Yet the moment I have to tell the guy I’m dating that sex is not an option, I become a squirmy, awkward, fidgety girl who can’t make eye contact or put together a complete sentence.

Think junior high dance, only without a bathroom to hide in.

In a way, it feels like they cheated on you (and you can’t get it out of your head).

Unfortunately for them, they didn’t cheat on you, but they get treated as if they did.

Our relationship lasted longer and was in many ways more fulfilling than it would have been if we hadn’t waited.

Here are a few things I learned from that experience…

It’s true I always had a crush on one (or two) boys and had my fair share of boyfriends, but no relationship ever got serious enough where sex was even a thought, let alone a deal breaker.

And maybe one day you’ll snap and call them a whore or accuse them of not taking sex seriously, etc.

Finding a 27-year-old virgin these days may seem about as realistic as coming upon a unicorn in the forest, being struck by lightning, or seeing a unicorn get struck by lightning. But of course, there are also a lot of practical considerations, like it's hard to have a child when you have no money.

I know of just one -- though I managed to find her without looking, since she's also my best friend. What follows is probably the most direct conversation we've had in years. It's like, you're comfortable with that person in a way that kind of can contain the sexual, and so I think even if it's just like, I don't know what the hell we're doing! Or, you know, when you're in the middle of your Ph D.

The Chat was never really an issue for me until three years ago.

I wasn’t like many teens, who consider sex a rite of passage.